"Mechanized Animals" by Ravana

Mechanized Animals

by Ravana

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 Ogg Vorbis version

Originality: 3/10Technical: 7/10
Theme: 1/10Quality: 7/10
Arrangement: 1/10Global: 3/10

Genre: industrial

Starts of as a dark, ambient & industrial track, but suddenly it transformes into a uptempo sort-of Jermaine Jackson & Pia Zadora 'when the rain begins to fall' (but then far worse) 80's synthesizertrack. The production is okay: there's a rather clear and transparant overall production with good placement of sounds and volumes.

The weakness of the track is that there is no actual theme. There's a hint of game music in it, but it would absolutely freak me out and irritate me beyond limitations if this was used in a popcap game. It's too weird, too chaotic, too much lacking a purpose and too without theme to be of much influence on the listener or this compo.
Originality: 2/10Technical: 2/10
Theme: 1/10Quality: 3/10
Arrangement: 1/10Global: 2/10

An experimental/industrial/ambient track I'd say. Plays a lot with over-distorted sounds. That is, up untill about 1:53, when the track turns completely and tries to fall into the part of happy dance music. I'm not too fond of this turn of events, to be honest. Either the intro should have been left out completely, or the intro should have been developed and the rest left out. Considering the end of the track has more flow, I'd say the intro should be cut away.

There are some instruments a bit out of tune also. The bassline for instance plays a tiny bit too high I think. The whole drums department could use a work over. The snare sounds sloppy. The kick is a bit weak also. In general, the drums department seems to suffer from bad samples.
The melodies are ok, but sound a bit forced at some points. At 4:49 about for instance the melody makes a somewhat off turn imo. Overall the track does have a nice flow, after 1:53 that is. Had you left out the intro then this could have scored higher. Or, had you developed the industrial theme of the intro then this could have scored high in the originality part. This mix however doesn't work.

Structure is this tracks biggest fall. It sounds a bit like one of my early tracks, where I wanted to cram as much of my ideas into one track, instead of spredding them out on several tracks.
TNK / ATK project
Originality: 4/10Technical: 6/10
Theme: 3/10Quality: 4/10
Arrangement: 5/10Global: 4/10

Originality: 4
Theme: 3
Arrangement: 5
Technical: 6
Quality: 4
Global: 4

Dark electro noise ambient or whatever you call this style, it starts (very) slowly, and evolves even slower. Then at pattern 11(h), the track suddenly changes in some kind of electro pop. If that was the intro, it's way too long ! The pop part is not bad, but not good neither. No distinct theme nor any powerful aspect emerges. The drum & bass lines are way too low and thin. This gives it all a quite boring feeling.

My hints :
- Choose whether you want to do pure moods music or something using the pop codes (catchy melodies...) and then follow what your choice implies.
- Don't be that repetitive.
- Get the sound more powerful. All sounds so thin, mainly because the sound spectrum is not used at full extend (Get deeper in the bass, higher in the highs...). The whole stuff is sometimes quite muddy too.

One of the too many entries that does not provide anything that makes it stand out in any way. A producer told me a few days that the 70's had the flower power generation, the 2000's have the "flat" generation. Your entry gives him right. Be white or black, but don't be grey ! (emotionally, of course).

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